I’ve been toying around with adopting a new personal political code. I’m almost to the point, as strongly as I feel about some issues, that I think that changing how we do politics is more important than which party happens to win power in any given year. I think we need to focus on electing people of integrity and then allowing them to maintain that integrity. The way the we run and publicize elections these days almost guarantees that won’t happen, and the only way to change is to - all of us - stop putting up with it.
I know it’s important to be politically active, and I plan to continue to be - in respectful, productive ways. But so often we find ourselves in screaming matches (real or virtual) with each other over wedge issues that are obviously, transparently fabricated by campaign directors to turn people against each other, make them so angry they’re sure to turn out to vote. Or by the media to garner viewers who get sucked even further into their bitter cycles of hate and fear. I just don’t want to play this game - and it is a game - anymore.
So here are some rules I may try out this election season. I hope they don’t come off as cowardly - I don’t think they are. I just believe that we need to give each other a little space, give our potential leaders some room to be the genuinely good human beings I think they intend to be.
1) Learn enough to know who you want to vote for. Then make sure to vote. Don’t vote if you don’t know what you’re doing. Also, don’t be afraid to vote for a third party candidate or write someone in. That’s a bold, brave choice, and it’s good for all of us to have non-mainstream views represented.
2) Turn off the radio or TV, leave the website or close the newspaper if the political piece deals with campaign strategy (what Romney said to try to entice values voters or what Obama did to try to gain the upperhand from Republicans) rather than substantive policy questions (what each would do about immigration). You need to know very little about how someone attempts to win an election - only enough to gather whether or not s/he will operate ethically when in office. The rest will make you angry and encourage the kind of sensationalism that makes elections toxic.
3) Do not react to any purposefully inflammatory comment, video, footage, Facebook status, meme, or article no matter how ridiculous, offensive, or enticing. Don’t click “Like,” even if it’s pro your candidate. Don’t comment. Don’t write a letter to the editor about it. Don’t reblog it with a rebuttal. Just don’t acknowledge it. Those kinds of moments are orchestrated to draw attention to a candidate for all the wrong reasons. Every click, every uptick in web traffic, every page view gives that person exactly what s/he wants. We all should be better than this.
4) When politics come up in person you have two choices. If you sense that your dad or sister or friend genuinely wants to talk, wants a real exchange of ideas…if you trust this person not to resort to snarky comments or chest-pounding, engage. Breathe. Keep that heart rate normal. Listen carefully. Stop yourself from interrupting or making faces. Speak calmly. If you don’t know or aren’t sure, say so, don’t posture. If instead you sense the person just wants a fight, deflect the conversation. Make a joke. Go to the restroom. Think about your trip to Florida in March. Get out of there. You don’t need to prove any points to anybody.
5) Respect those who win. You don’t have to like them, but acknowledging their victory and accepting them as your President, Congressional Representative, Senator, Mayor is non-negotiable. I had a political science professor remind my class of how critical it’s been to the U.S.’s stability that even when we hate a candidate, we accept the electoral process. And when the results are contested - like Bush’s 2000 victory - it goes to court, it doesn’t result in a revolution.
6) Keep it in perspective. You live in a great country, and you have a great life. If you’re worried about others, channel your frustration toward doing what you personally can do to help. Also, win or lose, remember that Americans are notoriously fickle. It’ll all change again in about 2-4 years.
